It begins when I start and it ends when I do
but when do I end? I don't, I keep going and
that is what it all comes down to in the end.
I am a machine that works hard all day and
yet in the end, there is no pay off. My hours,
my tears, my sweat are put into everything.

I miss him more than he could know and
maybe keeping busy is a good thing. But
somehow it feels like I'm cheating myself
out of really knowing what it's like to miss
him. I hope he know I'm hanging onto him
and all his memories that make me who
I am. I'll never forget his smile. Impossible.

I'm trying my hardest and it's all I can really
ask of myself at the moment. You've helped
me so far along and I'm begging you to keep
on doing what you are. You're giving me proof
that people don't walk out when you need
them most. Please don't lose me. Don't let me go.

I'm scared of so much because he's gone but
slowly I'm learning to smile again. To be honest,
I'm scared to death that things won't work out
with anything in my life. I love him and I love
you and that's okay because you're just like him.
He was my idol growing up and you will be
the example I make out of every other man.

Just please mean it when you say you love me.